Pondering a lil bit about life..deep thinking time.
As I was lying in bed, coming off my XL coffee high, I got to thinking about where I wanted my life to go. It's a healthy thing to do every once and a while I think and I haven't done it in a very long time.When I'm finally "grown up" and living on my own, I would like my life to be comfortable. I hate the fact that my parents are essentially living from paycheck to paycheck. Something I've always wanted for myself was a nice stability with regards to my money. I don't care if I'm ever going to be rich, but I want money to not be a worry in my life; I hate it, so I don't want to have to think about it.
That brings me to my career. I'm not totally sure what I wish to do at the moment, unfortunately. When I do decide though, I want it to be something I am, first and foremost, happy at doing. I will not settle for much less in my work life. As I said before, this job doesn't have to make me rich, but I would like it to make me stable in life.
Stability comes into play when I want to start a family. Over the past year or so, what I've wanted for my future has changed quite a bit, I think; for a certain other person had opened my eyes up to other possibilities for what a family could be. I used to be adamant about when I would settle down, I would have a wife with two kids; hopefully a boy and a girl, although any combination is fine by me. I would still like to have two children max, but adoption is an avenue I hadn't thought of before. Of course having my own children would be ...better? is that the word? Hopefully you get it. Yeah so anyways, adopting a child would be a great thing to do. To save another helpless person from growing up in an orphanage with no real parent is something that's seemingly grown on me, and would definitely be an option in the future should it arise.
To have a family I would have to have a wife to raise that family with. Now I don't know if at 21 years old, many people, specifically guys, are thinking about all this, but I do. For one reason or another I've always been looking for that woman that I feel I could be with, not just any person, you know? In a woman I look for someone who has some semblance of a brain. I like a challenge in a relationship, and If you cannot atleast be on my level, I don't know if it'd succeed. A family oriented person is very important. Over the last little while, family has moved up high on my list of who I should be, and the woman I'm with should also fit that. For some reason I find myself attracted to women who are more outgoing and exciting than I am. I guess it's because they bring out the inner me and I'm not as shy any more. Whatever the reason, I feel it's important. I would be lying if I said looks didn't come into play. I'm not going into any detail, because the looks I like are so varied; I have no set attraction to any particular woman...I just know.
I suppose I could go into a lot more detail about my ideal woman, but I won't. =P
I know many of the things I've written about may not happen, but I'd like atleast the majority of it to come to fruition. I feel I deserve atleast that.
-Peace
posted by Sean @ 10:18 AM
Comments: 6
